Tips for Divorce Mediation


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Most family law cases resolve by agreement, regardless of whether you are going through divorce, involved in a child custody or support case, or dealing with a post-judgment issue.  The only real difference is how much time, money, and aggravation it will take to get there. Divorce mediation is a great way to resolve your dispute and reach an agreement without the stress and expense of litigation, or time-consuming negotiation process when both sides are separately represented by counsel.

Instead, mediation involves both parties working with a neutral third-party, or a mediator, whose job it is to facilitate an agreement. A good mediator can streamline the process by educating the parties, gathering the necessary information, and presenting options that work for everyone involved. Despite the many advantages of this alternative form of conflict resolution, this process could still be difficult without the right preparation. Our knowledgeable attorneys have shared some tips for divorce mediation. If you have any further questions, please do not hesitate to reach out to our dedicated divorce attorneys.

Be Prepared

One of the most beneficial steps you can take before divorce mediation is to make a list of concerns, issues, and priorities that are important to you and be prepared to discuss them. It is wise to think about these same issues from the opposing perspective as areas of compromise will be vital to any successful mediation. It is important to remember that the more willing and open to compromise and resolution you are the more willing your partner might be to reciprocate.

Gather Documents

Beyond knowing what you want out of the process, having a list of your assets, liabilities, and personal possessions, as well as supporting documentation is also important to successful divorce mediation. The more work that is done before mediation, the faster and more efficient your time at mediation will be and the less stress you may feel.

Keep Your Emotions in Check

Try to recognize if you are being logical or if you are letting your emotions control your decision-making. Emotions run high during a divorce or family dispute, but you must remain calm and remember that when you are in mediation you and your partner are in control of the process, not the Judge.

Controlling your emotions allows you to focus on the issues and what is truly important to you. There is an old saying that divorce is a problem to solve, not a fight to win. When emotions are in check, we are able to solve the problem and not stay stuck in the fight.

Know Yourself and Your Situation

If you are not ready to compromise or do not have an open mind and heart, divorce mediation may not be the right process for you. The same is true of the other party – mediation may not be appropriate if someone is unreasonable or looking for a fight. The parties within mediation do not always have to agree, but they should at least be on the same page.  

Be Willing to Compromise

Successful divorce mediation does not necessarily mean that you will get everything you want. Instead, a successful mediation usually has both sides not entirely satisfied with the outcome. This does not mean that you should roll over, but instead that you should be willing to stand firm when necessary but also concede if there is a minor issue.  The more argumentative you are, the more you will push your partner into litigation.

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